Tim: ''What did the salt say to the pepper?''
Jim: ''Season's Greetings''
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Tim: ''Why does Santa come down the chimney?''
Jim: ''Because it soots him!''
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Tim: ''Why is a cat on the beach like Christmas?''
Jim: ''Because it has sandy claws!''.
Meanwhile, back in the jungle.................
Stanley: ''I just saw a huge jungle cat outside the tent!''
Oliver: ''Lion?''
Stanley: ''Absolutely not! I always tell the truth!''
Stanley: ''How do stop a rhinoceros from charging?''
Oliver: ''Cancel it's credit card!''
Stanley: ''What would you do if you were swallowed by an elephant?''
Oliver: ''Run around in circles until you are all pooped out!''
Stanley: ''Why doesn't Tarzan play poker with his chimpanzee friend?''
Oliver; ''Because he doesn't want to play cards with a Cheetah!''.
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Edgar was at the greasy spoon diner having lunch. The waitress was shouting orders to the kitchen staff.
''Hey Tiny!.. 2 ham and eggs!!''
''Hey Runt!... 3 coffees!!''
''Hey Shrimp-O! 1 ham sandwich!!''
''Hey Small Stuff!... 1 Apple pie and milk!''
''Hey Little One.. 2 burgers!''
''Aren't you being verbally abusive to the chef?'' asked the concerned Edgar.
''It's okay,'' said the waitress, '' He's a Short Order Cook!''.
Why was the cow driving the car?
Because it was a STEER!!!
How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator?
Because there are footprints in the Jello!
What's the difference between an Elephant and peanut butter?
An elephant doesn't stick to the roof of your mouth!.
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