Animal Jokes Page 3

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A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender:
- Got bread?
- No.
- Got bread?
- No Mr. Duck, we don't have any bread.
- Oh, Ok then. Doy ou have any bread?
- I already told you you stupid duck, we donít have any bread now if you ask me one more time I'll grab you by the neck and nail your beak to the counter!
- Got nails?
- No.
- Got bread?.




At the zoo:
- Look mommy, that gorilla looks just like grandma.
- Honey, we don't say mean things like that, you'd hurt her feelings.
- Sorry mommy, I didn't realize the gorilla would understand what I was saying.



   


   
The two birds had been boyfriend girlfriend for a long time and things had been going well, but today the girl bird was inconsolable.
- I already told you honey, I did not get married to someone else, I was abducted by a gang of ornithologists and they put this ring on me.




Arthur, does your dog bite?
- No Delbert, he doesn't.
- Oh good, I'll pet it then. Cute doggy doggy ..AAAAGHH. He bit me, you said your dog didn't bite.
- That's not my dog.




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