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Arthur came home from work. He was too tired so he went straight to bed. He saw that his wife was sound asleep, so he tried to be very quiet. He tucked himself in next to her. He looked at the end of the bed; he saw some feet sticking out from under the blanket, so he started counting them. 1..2..3..4..5..6. ''Oh. no something's wrong. There are two of us, so there should be four feet'', he told himself quietly, not wanting to wake his wife up. He stood up and walked to the end of the bed and started counting again. 1...2...3...4. Okay! There you go! He then went back to bed.
The small plane was going down with Arthur, Delbert and Douglas who was the pilot.
-Oh oh this is bad, said Douglas, we only have 2 parachutes .
Arthur quickly grabbed a parachute and jumped out.
Oh well, said Delbert. I guess the pilot has to go down with his plane, sorry buddy I'm gonna have to take the last chute, nice knowing you.
- Don't worry, said Douglas, Arthur took my backpack.
Delbert, Douglas, and Gertrude wanted to join a special forces combat unit and had to prove they could follow any order without hesitation. Delbert was told to go first.
- We have your wife tied up behind this door, said the instructor, I want you to take this gun and go in and kill her.
- Yes sir! Said Delbert and went in.
A little bit later he came out in tears.
I can't do it, I can't do it, he wept.
- You're a disgrace, yelled the instructor, pack up and go home right now, you're out!
Douglas came next. The same thing happened to him too and he got sent home.
Now it was Gertrude's turn.
- You know what to do! Yelled the instructor, your husband Arthur is in there, go in and kill him with this gun.
- Yes Sir! She said and went in.
After a few minutes she came out covered in blood.
- What happened in there?, asked the instructor.
- The gun wasn't loaded so I had to beat him to death with the gun sir!.
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