Ray: ''What do call an unsuccessful Veterinarian?''
Jay: '' A Butcher!''.
Arthur had been a car mechanic ever since he dropped out of high school, he died young at the age of 34. When he met Saint Peter at the gates of heaven he asked:
- Saint Peter, why did you let me die so young?
- Well now Arthur, based on how many hours you've been charging your customers according to your accounting records you are 95 years old.
The Pope flies in from Vatican City and his private jet lands at Kennedy Airport, New York... A stretch limosine is there to pick him up and take him to his downtown hotel... The Pope says to the driver... ''You know back at the Vatican I rarely get to drive.. Would you mind if I drove?''... The Driver answers... ''You know, In all my years I have never rode in the back. You got a deal!''.... And so they take off down the freeway to town.. In the back of this fancy car behind dark tinted windows the driver is relaxing in luxury listening to the stereo and drinking scotch whiskey from the mini bar.... Up front, things are not going well.... It turns out Pope is a lousy driver.. Speeding and swerving through traffic.... His bad driving catches the attention of a State Trooper and he is pulled over... The trooper asks the Pope for his license and is stunned realizing he has just pulled over the Pope driving a limo.... The Trooper heads back to his cruiser and gets on the radio to his sergeant at State Police Headquarters and says....
''Hey Sarge!! I just pulled a really important guy for speeding. What should I do?''
''That depends,''asks the Sarge,''How important is he?''
''I'm not sure,''answers the Trooper,''All I know is that he has the Pope driving him!''.
copyright © jokesandlies.com