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These are some lies we made up about Burns.
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart emerged by a lady hiking along a trail near Burns.
A gigantic dormouse was distinguished tossing chunks of concrete into the current at Cow Creek very late at night.
A minotaur was perceived at night gazing across Cow Creek Sink.
The phantom of a guy with a word etched into his nose has regularly been observed having a seat in a beanbag in a trailer in Burns. A local man asserts that this ghost likes scaring foolish folks who come looking for ghosts in Burns.
An extremely large mare is rumored to have been observed on one or two instances shouting beside a lamppost in Burns.
The ghost of an engine driver can often be made out rummaging around in the fridge in the kitchen of a Burns flat at midnight.
A sizeable bloodcurdling ogre may be witnessed very often taking a rest at the kitchen counter in a Burns house.
A female lacking a head is every now and then perceived staring at people in a Burns building through
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a door crack.
An enormous buffalo may every now and then be seen in a secluded zone in close proximity to Burns.
A space man from another planet has often been distinguished trying to get cars to stop alongside a murky highway close to Burns.
The martian mechanic of an extraterrestrial spaceship is frequently seen downing fuel
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from a fuel pump at a gasoline station in Burns.
An martian tourist from another galaxy has purportedly been noticed on several instances walking a Saint Bernard very late at night on a dark Burns residential road.
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Ghost Sightings From Burns
Submit a lie about Burns, Oregon:
Other untruthful towns near Burns, Oregon:
Hines, Oregon, 22 miles away
Princeton, Oregon, 23 miles away
Crane, Oregon, 24 miles away
Drewsey, Oregon, 24 miles away
Diamond, Oregon, 27 miles away
Seneca, Oregon, 34 miles away
Frenchglen, Oregon, 37 miles away
Canyon City, Oregon, 45 miles away
John Day, Oregon, 47 miles away
Prairie City, Oregon, 47 miles away
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Ghost Sightings From Burns
What do you call a hippie's wife?
Mississippi.
Wow, thanks for taking me on this helicopter ride Delbert, this is my first time in a helicopter you know. What's that big thing spinning on top of our heads anyway?
- That's the air conditioner Arthur. Last time I went it stopped and the pilot started sweating like a pig.
Arthur's mama is so fat she fell out of the couch on both sides.
Arthur: -What will seven days of dieting do to you?
Delbert: - Don't know
Arthur: -They make one weak (week).
Hey Arthur, how did the job interview go, did they call you back?
- No Delbert, I don't know what happened, it all went so well until the very end when they asked me if I have any questions.
- Well what did you ask them?
- I asked them if they file charges.
Doctor Rueprecht, please help me. I'm seeing double.
- Ok Arthur, let's take a look at that, why don’t you have a seat on that chair so I can examine you.
- The one on the left or the one on the right?.
A note from an kindergarten teacher says: If you promise not to believe everything Arthur Jr. says about what happened in the classroom today, I promise not to believe everything he ever said happened at home.
Arthur called Delbert on the phone:
- Please come over to my house and help me, I bought this cereal box that came with a free jig saw puzzle and I've been trying to put it together for a week now.
-Ok, said Delbert, I'll be right over.
When he got to Arthur's house Arthur took him to his kitchen table.
- Here it is, can you help me get this thing figured out?
Delbert looked at the table and asked: - Why is your table covered in cornflakes?.
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