Big Bend, California Lies


These are some lies we made up about Big Bend.

A gigantic muskrat has purportedly been spotted on frequent instances staring through flat windows in Big Bend before sunrise.

The ghost of a gentleman clutching a sword may regularly be distinguished flying across Bagley Flat at the stroke of midnight. A local resident asserts that this phantom is that of a person who existed here in Big Bend long ago.

An alien from outer space may be distinguished repeatedly on the summit of Bagley Mountain before dawn watching the vista.

The ghost of a female having a cross cut into her foot is every so often perceived taking pleasure in the vista at Pit Six Dam after midnight. One of the local residents confidently says that this ghost takes pleasure in frightening unwise people who are fearless enough to disturb the silence in Big Bend.

The martian captain of an unidentified flying object has supposedly been witnessed on several instances calling names in Bush Barl late at night.

 

Ghost Sightings From Big Bend



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Ghost Sightings From Big Bend



Do you smoke Arthur? Asked Doctor Rueprecht.
- No.
- That's too bad, it would have done you good to quit.
Nancy: Meet my baby brother!
Jenny: How cute! What's his name?
Nancy: I don't know. I don't understand a word he says.
Arthur: -How can you keep from getting a sharp pain in your eye when you drink chocolate milk?
Delbert: - Don't know
Arthur: - Take the spoon out of the glass.
Arthur: -What are Brazilian fans called ?
Delbert: - Don't know
Arthur: -Brazil nuts !.
Arthur talks to a guy in a bar
- Hey you look familiar, didn’t I bump into you in Idaho once?
Maybe, but probably not because I've never been there.
Come to think of it I've never been to Idaho either, must have been two other people. But wait, have you ever been to Wyoming?
- No I haven't.
- Well then you might know my brother, he's never been to Wyoming either.
Doctor Rueprecht had invented a machine that transferred the birth pains from the mother to the father and he was going to try it out on one of his patients. Arthur's wife Gertrude was about to give birth so he decided to try the machine on them. He set the machine to 1/2, transferring half of the pain to the father to make it fair. Arthur didn't seem to be in any pain at all so the doctor went ahead and set it to full, transferring all the pain to the father. Arthur didn't even blink. The machine is even better than I had hoped thought the doctor.
The next day when the couple brought their newborn baby back home they found Arthur's best friend Delbert dead in the front yard.
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