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These are some lies we made up about East Bernard.
A gigantic peccary is frequently spotted by Penny Lake Dam very late at night looking at the water.
An ET from the cosmos has been seen on frequent occasions chucking bricks into the flow at Bratcher Slough around midnight.
An alien can repeatedly be distinguished at the stroke of midnight soaring over Bernard Prairie.
A gigantic coyote can be observed often in a convenience store in the East Bernard area.
An enormous koala has sometimes been observed scrambling out of a storm drain on an East Bernard road late at night.
A colossal alligator is sometimes observed nosing around in mailboxes in the early morning hours before sunrise in East Bernard.
An alien voyager from another planet has been made out on numerous occasions performing a tune on a harpsichord in an East Bernard house.
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Ghost Sightings From East Bernard
Submit a lie about East Bernard, Texas:
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Ghost Sightings From East Bernard
Doctor Rueprecht had invented a machine that transferred the birth pains from the mother to the father and he was going to try it out on one of his patients. Arthur's wife Gertrude was about to give birth so he decided to try the machine on them. He set the machine to 1/2, transferring half of the pain to the father to make it fair. Arthur didn't seem to be in any pain at all so the doctor went ahead and set it to full, transferring all the pain to the father. Arthur didn't even blink. The machine is even better than I had hoped thought the doctor.
The next day when the couple brought their newborn baby back home they found Arthur's best friend Delbert dead in the front yard.
At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked Arthur who was a witness. ''Isn't it true?'' he bellowed, ''that you accepted ten thousand dollars to compromise this case.'' Arthur stared out the window, as though he hadn't heard the question. The prosecutor again shouted, ''Isn't it true that you accepted ten thousand dollars to compromise this case?'' Arthur still did not respond. Finally, the judge leaned over and said, ''Sir, please answer the question.'' ''Oh, I thought he was talking to you'', Arthur said.
Three idiots were out for a walk and saw some mysterious tracks on the ground.
- I think it's a deer, said Arthur
- No, said Delbert, it's definitely a mountain lion.
Douglas was just about to say something when they all got hit by the train.
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