Warrensburg, Missouri Lies


These are some lies we made up about Warrensburg.

A gargantuan capybara is rumored to have been made out on one or two instances on a Warrensburg lane on a dark night.

The extraterrestrial captain of an alien spacecraft can regularly be made out floating in the air like a blimp in Warrensburg.

The ghost of an aged Indian chief has every now and then been spotted hauling a corpse over the grass in Blind Boone Park at night. Several of the people who live in this town claim this ghost might be a renowned former time resident of Warrensburg. Nonetheless, this ghost unquestionably is bloodcurdling; one that you shouldn't go searching for.

A very large cheetah is sometimes made out at Pertle Springs very late at night stacking boulders.

The ghost of an aged cleaning lady is known to have been observed on frequent occasions down near the waterfront at Glazebrooks Lake obliterating a bag. It has been alleged that this exact spirit is the tormented spirit of a long gone Warrensburg resident.

A
 
    Pterodactyl may occasionally be perceived staring at the water by Foster Lake Dam late in the night.

A dark rat that shape-shifted into a woman has regularly been witnessed glugging down paint in Bear Creek. If you listen to what the people who live here assert, this spirit is the spirit of a traveler that was killed while driving through Warrensburg
  in the past. In any event, it's a menacing ghost that should be shunned.

The spirit of a young-looking woman outfitted as a house keeper is regularly witnessed in a hardware store in the Warrensburg neighborhood. Local people who have seen this spirit assert this spirit is that of a local resident who had a home here in Warrensburg many years ago.

A colossal coati has purportedly been perceived on a handful of occasions trying on a jacket in a Warrensburg home.

An extremely large dog can frequently be noticed quite near the entrance to Harry S Truman State Park searching for a person.

An martian tourist from another planet may be observed time and again ascending out from a drain hole on a Warrensburg lane before dawn.

Galileo has every so often been observed snooping in mailboxes at night in Warrensburg.

The ghost of a young cowboy is every now and then observed playing a harp in a Warrensburg apartment.

A chilling beast has been seen on a few instances in a Warrensburg school before sunrise
marching the hallways.

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Ghost Sightings From Warrensburg


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Ghost Sightings From Warrensburg



Honey, Gertrude, I'm home . . . Oh my god, what's this mess?
- Oh Arthur honey, yesterday you asked me what exactly I do at home all day and today I didn’t do those things.
Arthur: -Why do church bells never send e-mails?
Delbert: - Don't know
Arthur: -They'd rather give each other a ring.
Arthur came to work one morning in a state of shock and disbelief.
- What's wrong Arthur, asked a coworker, did something horrible happen to you?
- No, not to me, replied Arthur, but to my best friend Delbert.
- Why, what happened to Delbert?
- He ran away with my wife.
Arthur: -Why is Otto the most common name in Minnesota?
Delbert: - Don't know
Arthur: - There's only two letters to remember.
Knock Knock
Who's there!
Sit!
Sit who?
Sit down and be quiet !.
BEEP BEEP BEEP - We interrupt this radio broadcast for an urgent traffic announcement, a vehicle is driving the wrong direction on I-5, please watch out for this vehicle.
- Did you hear that, a car going the wrong way, that's the dumbest thing I ever heard, says the old-timer to his wife, there's hundreds of 'em!.
Arthur had taken up art and was showing his wife Gertrude his latest paintings.
- Yes Arthur, this one is really nice, and this one too. But oooh what is this hideous thing, that's the ugliest picture I've ever seen, please take it away before I puke my guts out honey.
- But Gertrude dear, that one is not one of my paintings, that's a mirror.
Arthur was trying to make it as an artist. He was trying to sell a painting of his named ''Grazing Cow''.
- It looks great, said the potential buyer, but why isn’t there any grass in the picture?
- Well, said Arthur, the cow ate all the grass so there's no grass left.
-Hmm, yeah, ok but what about the cow? Why isn't there a cow in the picture?
- Well, the cow left after all the grass was eaten.
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