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These are some lies we made up about Utica.
A huge gila monster is every now and then seen on the pinnacle of Shale Hill before sunrise watching the landscape.
An extremely large guinea pig has been said to have been distinguished on numerous occasions by Englert Lake Dam very late at night gazing at the water.
A space man can sometimes be distinguished watching shows in a Utica living room around midnight.
A colossal burro was made out rummaging around in trash container on a Utica lane.
The ghost of a man having half his head gone appeared on a Utica road before sunrise. The ghost was unconcerned that there was someone other nearby.
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Ghost Sightings From Utica
Submit a lie about Utica, Missouri:
Other untruthful towns near Utica, Missouri:
Dawn, Missouri, 5 miles away
Chillicothe, Missouri, 6 miles away
Mooresville, Missouri, 6 miles away
Ludlow, Missouri, 7 miles away
Breckenridge, Missouri, 13 miles away
Braymer, Missouri, 14 miles away
Tina, Missouri, 14 miles away
Chula, Missouri, 14 miles away
Wheeling, Missouri, 17 miles away
Jamesport, Missouri, 18 miles away
Trenton, Missouri, 18 miles away
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Ghost Sightings From Utica
Delbert the farm worker went to pick up Arthur the farmer at the airport.
- Did anything unusual happen while I was gone Delbert?
- No, Arthur, nothing unusual.
- What's that in the back of the truck?
- The burned pigs.
- Burned pigs?
- Yes the barn burned down Arthur.
- The barn burned down?
- Yes, it was ignited by the burning house.
- The house burned down too?
- Yes, one of the candles fell over.
- Candles? What candles?
- The ones by your wife's coffin.
- My wife's coffin? Gertrude died!!?
- Yes, Gertrude fell off the roof.
- What was she doing on the roof?
- She was drunk.
- Well, that's nothing unusual.
- Right Arthur like I said, nothing unusual happened. .
Arthur: -How can you keep from getting a sharp pain in your eye when you drink chocolate milk?
Delbert: - Don't know
Arthur: - Take the spoon out of the glass.
If ''CON'' is the opposite of ''PRO'', what is the opposite of PROGRESS?.
Her vocabulary was as bad as, as hmmm , never mind.
Time flies. But you can't, they're too fast.
Delbert, I'm so glad that fish I caught yesterday got away.
- Glad?
- Yeah Delbert, there wasn't enough space for the both of us in the boat.
Arthur and his wife Gertrude was out for a romantic walk.
- Watch out Gertrude, dog poop, don’t step in it.
- Nah, that doesn’t look like dog poop. But I wonder what it could be. I'm curious, could you smell it dear and tell me what it is.
- Hmm, smells like dog poop to me.
- I'm not convinced dear, could you please touch it.
- Ok dear, for you anything. ... Well it does feel like dog poop
- I'm still not quite convinced dear, could you please taste it and tell me what it is.
- No Gertrude, can we just leave this thing behind us and move on not knowing what it is please?
- No Arthur, I really want to know what that is, now take a big bit out of it and tell me what it is.
Ok, ok, for you my dear anything...
Arthur takes a bite, chews it well.
-Aaahhh!!! &*$#@#$%!!! This is disgusting !!! It's definitely dog poop, no doubt about it.
- Lucky we didn't step in it then Arthur.
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