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New Hampton, Missouri Lies | |
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These are some lies we made up about New Hampton.
A lady with no head has repeatedly been observed hauling a body from the ice cold water of Ames Branch after midnight.
A space alien is regularly seen at Nelson Lake Dam late in the night talking into the thin air.
An martian explorer from another planet is rumored to have been distinguished on many occasions peeping through trailer windows in New Hampton late at night.
A massive sloth can be observed over and over again watching television in a New Hampton living room before dawn.
A space invader from space has occasionally been made out searching through trash cans on a New Hampton lane.
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Ghost Sightings From New Hampton
Submit a lie about New Hampton, Missouri:
Other untruthful towns near New Hampton, Missouri:
Martinsville, Missouri, 9 miles away
Bethany, Missouri, 9 miles away
Pattonsburg, Missouri, 9 miles away
Coffey, Missouri, 10 miles away
Albany, Missouri, 12 miles away
Mc Fall, Missouri, 13 miles away
Denver, Missouri, 14 miles away
Altamont, Missouri, 16 miles away
Hatfield, Missouri, 16 miles away
Ridgeway, Missouri, 16 miles away
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Ghost Sightings From New Hampton
A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender:
- Got bread?
- No.
- Got bread?
- No Mr. Duck, we don't have any bread.
- Oh, Ok then. Doy ou have any bread?
- I already told you you stupid duck, we don’t have any bread now if you ask me one more time I'll grab you by the neck and nail your beak to the counter!
- Got nails?
- No.
- Got bread?.
How did Arthur die from drinking milk?
- The cow sat down.
Gertrude was making breakfast for Arthur and the kids in the morning when Arthur rushes into the kitchen acting hysterically.
MORE EGGS!! MORE EGGS!! You need to use more eggs. MORE BUTTER TOO!! And MORE SALT!! NO NOT THAT MUCH!! NO NOT THERE OVER THERE!! Why don't you listen to me when you're cooking?? I said MORE EGGS!! no that's too many AAAHHH! TURN THEM OVER NOW!! HURRY! I SAID NOW!! More salt there, no not there I said THERE!! AAAAHH!! YOU'RE RUINING BREAKFAST!!
- Calm down Arthur, what's gotten into you?
- Oh nothing dear, I just wanted you to know how I feel when I'm driving.
If ''CON'' is the opposite of ''PRO'', what is the opposite of PROGRESS?.
Boss! There's a man here, he says it’s about a bill.
- Uhoh! Tell him I'm not here, tell him I'm sick today or something.
- Ok, boss.
A bit later.
- Is he gone?
Yes boss, he said don’t worry, he'll come back and pay the bill next month instead.
A sailor and a pirate are talking in a bar.
- Wow, said the sailor, you really have it all. Wooden leg, hand hook, eye patch. How did you loose your leg?
- Har, I fell overboard in a battle and a shark bit off my leg.
- Whoo, sounds painful, how about your hand how did you lose that?
- Har, har. It was cut off by an enemies sword during battle.
- Wow, and how about your eye, how did you lose your eye?
- Har, that happened when a mosquito flew into my eye, har.
- A mosquito in the eye, how could you lose an eye from that?
- Har Har, it was my first day with the hook, har.
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