Auburndale, Wisconsin Lies


These are some lies we made up about Auburndale.

The extraterrestrial technician of an unidentified flying object was observed by North Fork Hemlock Creek mounding pieces of wood.

Snow White came into view dragging a dead body over rocks in Kandy Kane Park late in the night.

An enormous kangaroo was distinguished scrambling out of a drain hole on an Auburndale residential street late at night.

Alexander the Great was distinguished on the summit of Smoky Hill late at night glancing at the view.

An ET from planet Pluto was made out playing a piece of music on a harp in an Auburndale flat.

 

Ghost Sightings From Auburndale



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Ghost Sightings From Auburndale



Teacher: - Arthur please point to America on the map.
Arthur: -This is it.
Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America?
Class: -Arthur did.
Arthur was blind, Delbert was deaf, Douglas was in a wheel-chair and they were out for a walk in the woods and came to a mysterious looking cave. There was a sign that said ''Enter this cave and a single wish of yours will come true''.
Arthur went in first, he came out ecstatic.
- I can see, I can see, hooray!
Delbert went in.
- I can hear, I can hear, he exclaimed happily.
- Douglas went next. After a while he came out and said
- Look guys, new wheels!.
Two burglars were getting very annoyed.
- Man, this is the 23rd safe we bust open tonight and not a penny, these guys are supposed to be loaded.
- Yeah, I though these safe factories made lots of money.
The police pulled Arthur's car over.
-Sir, do you mind if I go through your car?
- Not at all officer, but wouldn't it be easier to go around it.
Douglas is 34 years old still single. His best pal Arthur asked, ''Why aren't you married? Can't you find a woman who will be a good wife?'' Douglas said, ''Actually, I've found many I wanted to marry, but my mother doesn't like any of them.'' Arthur thinks for a moment and says, ''I've got an idea , just find a girl who's just like your mother.'' A few months later they meet again and his friend asks, ''Did you find the perfect girl? '' Douglas answers, ''Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. My mother liked her very much.'' Since Douglas doesn't look happy, Arthur said, ''Then what's the problem?'' ''My father doesn't like her.'' , Douglas replied.
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