Clarkrange, Tennessee Lies


These are some lies we made up about Clarkrange.

A very large anteater has often been distinguished down by Boiling Spring on a dark night sniveling.

An alien from another galaxy is repeatedly observed before sunrise floating down Adams Branch.

Count Dracula has purportedly been observed on a handful of occasions by Furry Bend staring.

The alien commander of a UFO can frequently be seen in a Clarkrange school before sunrise strolling the corridors.

The spirit of a young gentleman sporting a winter jacket may be observed frequently flashing a kerosene lamp at Burnett Dam on a dark night.

 

Ghost Sightings From Clarkrange



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Ghost Sightings From Clarkrange



Arthur gets pulled over for speeding.
Cop: - License and registration please. You were driving 50 in a 35 sir.
Arthur: - No officer, I'm pretty sure I was only driving maybe 40.
Arthur's wife Gertrude: - Officer, officer, I aw the speedometer, he was driving 53 exactly.
Cop: - I appreciate your honesty, ok 53 it is then. Also sir, are you aware that your tail light is out?
Arthur: - Oh really, I had no clue, thank you for telling me officer I'll have that fixed right away.
Gertrude: - Officer, officer, that light has been out for a month, I've been bugging him to fix it every single day.
Arthur turns to his wife and screams: - SHUT UP YOU @#$%&@ IDIOT!
Cop: - Mam, does he always talk that way to you?
- Only when he's drunk.
Hey Arthur, do did you go waterskiing on your vacation like you had planned?
- No Delbert, I couldn't find a lake with a slope.
Arthur was blind, Delbert was deaf, Douglas was in a wheel-chair and they were out for a walk in the woods and came to a mysterious looking cave. There was a sign that said ''Enter this cave and a single wish of yours will come true''.
Arthur went in first, he came out ecstatic.
- I can see, I can see, hooray!
Delbert went in.
- I can hear, I can hear, he exclaimed happily.
- Douglas went next. After a while he came out and said
- Look guys, new wheels!.
Pay attention students, if this chemistry experiment fails the whole building will blow up and fly to high heavens in a cloud of black smoke. Now gather around so you can all follow along.
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