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West Topsham, Vermont Lies | |
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These are some lies we made up about West Topsham.
A massive buffalo has sometimes been seen by Duplissey Swamp looking angrily at the viewer.
A woman with a machete sticking out of her head is sometimes distinguished examining Foster Notch in detail around midnight.
A gargantuan ocelot is known to have been spotted on frequent occasions burrowing a crater up on the highest spot of Allen Hill.
The ghost of a female with a bag bound around her head can sometimes be noticed devastating a bag in Washington Wildlife Management Area at midnight.
A fairly transparent man clothed as the skipper of a vessel has frequently been seen in Barre City Municipal Forest very late at night chain-sawing down a soaring tree.
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Ghost Sightings From West Topsham
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Ghost Sightings From West Topsham
When the small town built a new bridge they installed a traffic counter to monitor traffic flow. The counter was getting close to the million mark, so they thought it would be a good idea to greet the millionth car an give him a prize. The counter read 999,999 and the sheriff and the mayor was standing by for the next car and here it came.
- Congratulations sir, you are the 1,000,000 th car to cross this bridge, you win $1,000.
- Wow a thousand bucks, yippie, I'm gonna go to driving school with that money and get myself one of them drivers licenses said Arthur.
- Don't listen to him, said his wife Gertrude in the passenger seat, he's drunk.
- I told you we wouldn't get far in a stolen car, said Delbert from the backseat.
Don't you ever get tired of doing nothing Arthur?
- Yes Delbert, but when I do I sit down and take a rest.
Bigamy and monogamy is the same thing Delbert.
- How's that Arthur?
- One wife too many.
Arthur: -What are Brazilian fans called ?
Delbert: - Don't know
Arthur: -Brazil nuts !.
Arthur had a new job on a cruise ship as an onboard magician, he had a nightly magic show to entertain the guests. At every show there was this clever but annoying kid in the audience who kept exposing the tricks. He would say things like ''the card's in his sleeve'', or ''the handkerchief is under the table cloth''. This made Arthur very angry but he put up with it since he wanted to keep his job on the ship.
One evening during the magic show the boat hit an uncharted underwater cliff and sank. Everyone on board drowned except Arthur and the annoying kid who both managed to climb up on an upside-down table from the ship that was floating around in the water.
They sat on the table for day and night, the kid didn't say a word, he just sat there quietly. Arthur didn't mind the silence at all. After 5 days the kid finally spoke.
- Alright alright, I give up, where did you hide the boat?.
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