Colonia, New Jersey Lies


These are some lies we made up about Colonia.

The ghost of a gentleman with half his head lost can occasionally be made out smoking a pipe at Bloodgoods Pond Dam before sunrise. It's been argued that this individual ghost might be a well-known former time native of Colonia.

The extraterrestrial pilot of an extraterrestrial spaceship has regularly been observed staggering from flat to flat late in the night on a Colonia residential street.

A big terrifying monster is repeatedly observed trying to dump a corpse in Ash Brook Swamp before sunrise.

A gargantuan mouse is known to have been witnessed on a handful of occasions sitting at the kitchen counter in a Colonia building.

A headless lady can regularly be noticed pulling a cadaver through some bushes in Albert G Waters Stadium before dawn.

The ghost of a ten feet high enormous person may be witnessed often looking at folks in a Colonia apartment through a door crack.

The phantom of a woman having half her head gone has from time
 
    to time been perceived hurling bricks into Echo Lake before dawn. One thing's for certain, it is indisputably a creepy ghost that any reasonable person wouldn't want to run into.

Ludwig van Beethoven is every now and then witnessed down by the water at Ferry Point flashing a lantern.

A giant otter has been made out on a few instances
  frightening folks by Ward Point Bend.

An ET from planet Venus can sometimes be perceived chucking stones into the current at Arthur Kill before dawn.

A space man from another world was made out in a desolate place near Colonia.

The martian pilot of an unidentified flying object came into view trying to get cars to stop in the middle of a gloomy road near Colonia.

A Velociraptor was distinguished sending a package at a Colonia post office.

An alien voyager from another galaxy showed up hurling bricks outside Blauvelt State Park.

An extraterrestrial from planet Mars was distinguished in Delaware National Scenic River outside the ranger station excavating an opening.

A space invader from another world was made out drinking gas from a gasoline pump at a gas station in Colonia.

The alien pilot of an unidentified flying object has often been witnessed walking a Saint Bernard at the stroke of midnight on a gloomy Colonia avenue.

A very large wombat is rumored to have been seen on a small
number of instances watching shows in a Colonia living room at midnight.

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Ghost Sightings From Colonia


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Ghost Sightings From Colonia



Delbert and Arthur were performing a strange ritual in the city park. Delbert was digging small holes in the ground with a spade, and Arthur was walking behind him filling the holes with a spade.
- What exacly are you guys doing? Asked a man who was passing by.
- We're planting flowers, said Arthur, usually Douglas is here too, but he's ill today, he's the one that puts the seed in the ground.
Gertrude was at the mall shopping and picked out a very expensive dress.
- Ok I'll take this one, and could you please deliver it to me. And make sure you first take it to the neighbors house accidentally with the price tag in plain sight.
Doctor Rueprecht, can you help my son, he thinks he's a chicken
- A chicken? That's odd, said Doctor Rueprecht, how long has he been believing he's a chicken?
- About a year now.
- A whole year? Why did you wait this long to see me? Asked the doctor.
- Well doctor, we're saving a lot of money on eggs.
How do you confuse an idiot?
- Don't know?
- Four. . . . Are you confused?.
Arthur talks to a guy in a bar
- Hey you look familiar, didn’t I bump into you in Idaho once?
Maybe, but probably not because I've never been there.
Come to think of it I've never been to Idaho either, must have been two other people. But wait, have you ever been to Wyoming?
- No I haven't.
- Well then you might know my brother, he's never been to Wyoming either.
At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked Arthur who was a witness. ''Isn't it true?'' he bellowed, ''that you accepted ten thousand dollars to compromise this case.'' Arthur stared out the window, as though he hadn't heard the question. The prosecutor again shouted, ''Isn't it true that you accepted ten thousand dollars to compromise this case?'' Arthur still did not respond. Finally, the judge leaned over and said, ''Sir, please answer the question.'' ''Oh, I thought he was talking to you'', Arthur said.
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