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Bernardsville, New Jersey Lies | |
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These are some lies we made up about Bernardsville.
An extraterrestrial traveler from the cosmos has frequently been witnessed taking in the view at Cromwell Lake Dam late in the night.
An extraterrestrial from Venus has supposedly been observed on numerous occasions looking at the vista from the highest spot of Blachleys Hill around midnight.
A big frightening monster can repeatedly be made out guzzling regular unleaded from a gasoline pump at a fueling station in Bernardsville.
An extraordinarily terrifying ghost may be spotted very frequently chatting into the night as if somebody else was there. One thing is for guaranteed, this ghost indisputably is bloodcurdling; one that any rational person would not want to come across.
An alien from deep space has every now and then been noticed in Morristown National Historical Park at night dragging a dead body over rocks.
An extremely large bighorn is once in a while made out throwing chunks of concrete into Sunset Lake before sunrise.
The
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martian crew member of an alien spacecraft has supposedly been seen on a handful of occasions at Black Brook on a dark night hurling stones into the current.
A giant gnu can once in a while be perceived looking through mobile home windows in Bernardsville late at night.
The spirit of an elderly prospector with a large mustache and a wooden
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right leg has frequently been distinguished watching shows in a Bernardsville living room around midnight. Either way, it's a creepy ghost that you shouldn't go seeking.
The ghost of an elderly woman grasping a firearm is known to have been spotted on numerous occasions searching through garbage cans on a Bernardsville road.
A space man from Jupiter may frequently be noticed on a Bernardsville residential road before dawn.
Ferdinand Magellan may be made out very frequently flinging stones in Delaware National Scenic River outside the park headquarters.
The ghost of an aged Indian chief has once in a while been seen quite near the entrance to Sterling Forest State Park mounding boulders.
A space invader from another world is sometimes witnessed hanging in the air like a blimp in Bernardsville.
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Ghost Sightings From Bernardsville
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Ghost Sightings From Bernardsville
Why doesn't Arthur eat pickles?
- He can't get his heads into the jar.
Arthur the Cannibal was having lunch with his friend Delbert the Cannibal.
- Delbert, I don't like my wife.
- At least eat your vegetables Arthur.
Arthur, have you been getting enough iron?
Yes, I chew my nails every day Doctor Rueprecht.
At the zoo:
- Look mommy, that gorilla looks just like grandma.
- Honey, we don't say mean things like that, you'd hurt her feelings.
- Sorry mommy, I didn't realize the gorilla would understand what I was saying.
Cowboy Arthur had just bought two horses from a local horse trader but had a hard time telling them apart. He decided to cut off one ear on one of the horses. But a few days later the other horse got his ear stuck in a gate and tore it off so now he couldn't tell them apart again.
So he came up with the idea to cut the tail off one of them. But the same night the other horse accidentally stuck his tail in the campfire and it burned off completely and the two horses looked the same to Cowboy Arthur again.
Arthur was out of ideas but one day his cousin Arthur came to visit. Arthur was a veterinarian, he suggested that he would amputate the legs on one of the horses to be able to tell them apart. Arthur thought that was a great idea and he had Arthur perform the procedure the same day.
- Wow cousin Arthur, that did it. The black horse is three feet shorter than the white horse now, no way I'll get 'em mixed up now.
Delbert the farm worker went to pick up Arthur the farmer at the airport.
- Did anything unusual happen while I was gone Delbert?
- No, Arthur, nothing unusual.
- What's that in the back of the truck?
- The burned pigs.
- Burned pigs?
- Yes the barn burned down Arthur.
- The barn burned down?
- Yes, it was ignited by the burning house.
- The house burned down too?
- Yes, one of the candles fell over.
- Candles? What candles?
- The ones by your wife's coffin.
- My wife's coffin? Gertrude died!!?
- Yes, Gertrude fell off the roof.
- What was she doing on the roof?
- She was drunk.
- Well, that's nothing unusual.
- Right Arthur like I said, nothing unusual happened. .
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