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Southampton, Massachusetts Lies | |
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These are some lies we made up about Southampton.
A huge budgerigar may occasionally be noticed trying to locate someone by Hackmatack Swamp.
An extremely large walrus was spotted very late at night glancing across Alder Meadow.
A space invader from planet Saturn showed up taking pleasure in the panorama at Alder Pond Dam in the early morning hours.
The ghost of a young female wearing a bloody wedding gown was noticed bass fishing from the water's edge of Alder Pond at midnight. The eye witness became frightened and escaped.
An ET from space appeared in the early morning hours drifting down Alder Meadow Brook.
A dinosaur was perceived in Apremont Park around midnight struggling to snatch something.
A very large ox was made out in a Southampton area hardware store, pacing the aisles.
An extraterrestrial has frequently been distinguished frightening people at midnight by a mailbox in Southampton.
An enormous zebra has purportedly been distinguished on numerous instances late at night checking out Bush Notch in detail.
A gargantuan koodoo can regularly be observed pacing through a home in Southampton.
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Ghost Sightings From Southampton
Submit a lie about Southampton, Massachusetts:
Other untruthful towns near Southampton, Massachusetts:
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Holyoke, Massachusetts, 7 miles away
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West Springfield, Massachusetts, 8 miles away
Feeding Hills, Massachusetts, 9 miles away
Williamsburg, Massachusetts, 9 miles away
Southwick, Massachusetts, 9 miles away
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Ghost Sightings From Southampton
Arthur: -What will seven days of dieting do to you?
Delbert: - Don't know
Arthur: -They make one weak (week).
Arthur, how did you manage to break your leg raking leaves?
- I fell out of the tree.
Computers are like air conditioners: they stop working properly when you open windows.
Arthur rushes into the restaurant at the airport and says:
- Hurry hurry, my flight leaves in 5 minutes so I don’t have time to order anything, just give me the check.
Why on earth did you shave your neck Arthur?
-Oops, must have put my shirt on backwards.
Why doesn't Arthur eat pickles?
- He can't get his heads into the jar.
A street bum came up to Arthur in the supermarket parking lot.
- Hey man, you got 5 bucks for food?
- Sorry I'm all out of change but I ust bought some beer, I'll give you a bottle if you want.
- Thanks man, I appreciate it but I don't drink.
- Oh, ok, well how about a smoke?
- Nah, I don't smoke either.
- Oh, ok well, I'll tell you what I'll do, I'm going out to the race track tomorrow and I got a tip, I'll put 10 bucks on the horse in your name.
- That's really kind of you sir but I don't gamble.
- No kidding, ok come home with me then, my wife's making dinner right now.
- I'd love that sir.
After geting home Arthur says:
- Gertrude honey I'm home, look I brought a guest for dinner. I want you to see what happens to people who don't drink, smoke or gamble.
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on the beds next to each other, outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, ''What are you in here for?'' The second kid says, ''I'm in here to get my tonsils out.'' The first kid says, ''You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze!'' The second kid then asks, ''What are you here for?''
The first kid says, ''A circumcision.'' And the second kid says, ''Whoa! I had that done when I was born. I couldn't walk for a year!''
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