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Assonet, Massachusetts Lies | |
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These are some lies we made up about Assonet.
A giant opossum may be made out over and over again up on the apex of Breakneck Hill gazing angrily at the eye witness.
A space invader from another part of the galaxy has every now and then been seen at a public phone in Assonet using the phone.
The extraterrestrial technician of a UFO is sometimes witnessed staring across Assonet Bay on a dark night.
The ghost of a tough lumberjack carrying a large axe has allegedly been distinguished on frequent occasions trashing a hat by the water at Assonet Neck.
The menacing ghost of a Gaul can once in a while be made out searching for an object in Assonet River. If you listen to what the locals declare, this ghost is that of a local person who settled here in Assonet some time ago.
A space invader from planet Pluto has frequently been spotted down near King Philip Spring before dawn eating a carrot.
A guy that turned into a vampire is repeatedly perceived walking through an Assonet area
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churchyard. Residents who have seen this ghost claim this ghost enjoys terrifying unwise people who come looking for ghosts in Assonet. In any event, this is an unlikable spirit that you wouldn't want to bump into in the early morning hours.
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Ghost Sightings From Assonet
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Other untruthful towns near Assonet, Massachusetts:
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East Freetown, Massachusetts, 7 miles away
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Taunton, Massachusetts, 7 miles away
Raynham, Massachusetts, 7 miles away
Lakeville, Massachusetts, 8 miles away
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Ghost Sightings From Assonet
Arthur was lying in bed gazing at the stars, and then he thought to himself, what the hell happened to the ceiling.
Hey Arthur, what do lawyers use as birth-control?
- Don't know Delbert.
- Their personalities.
Delbert, Douglas, and Gertrude wanted to join a special forces combat unit and had to prove they could follow any order without hesitation. Delbert was told to go first.
- We have your wife tied up behind this door, said the instructor, I want you to take this gun and go in and kill her.
- Yes sir! Said Delbert and went in.
A little bit later he came out in tears.
I can't do it, I can't do it, he wept.
- You're a disgrace, yelled the instructor, pack up and go home right now, you're out!
Douglas came next. The same thing happened to him too and he got sent home.
Now it was Gertrude's turn.
- You know what to do! Yelled the instructor, your husband Arthur is in there, go in and kill him with this gun.
- Yes Sir! She said and went in.
After a few minutes she came out covered in blood.
- What happened in there?, asked the instructor.
- The gun wasn't loaded so I had to beat him to death with the gun sir!.
Doctor Rueprecht the gynecologist had decided to change his career and become a mechanic. So he signed up for evening classes and learned all he could. When time for the exam approached, he prepared carefully for weeks, and completed the exam. When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained 150%. Fearing an error, he called the instructor, and asked him about the mark. The instructor said, ''During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark. I gave you an extra 50% because you did all of it THROUGH the muffler?? .
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