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Ghost Sightings From Lithuania
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Ghost Sightings From Lithuania
How did Arthur die from drinking milk?
- The cow sat down.
Arthur, why do you always walk around with your hands in your pockets?
- Well Delbert, uhm, it's kinda embarrassing but ok, I'll tell you. My fingers are different length and I have a complex about that.
BEEP BEEP BEEP - We interrupt this radio broadcast for an urgent traffic announcement, a vehicle is driving the wrong direction on I-5, please watch out for this vehicle.
- Did you hear that, a car going the wrong way, that's the dumbest thing I ever heard, says the old-timer to his wife, there's hundreds of 'em!.
Time flies. But you can't, they're too fast.
Arthur was sitting in the bathtub shivering.
- G G Gertrude D d d dear.. C c call D d doctor R R Rueprecht and ask him if I really need to take these pills with cold water.
Arthur: -When you fall off a ladder, what would you fall against?
Delbert: - Don't know
Arthur: -Against your will.
Dad, I think I'm old enough to drive the car.
- Yes son, you are. But the car isn't.
Why doesn't Arthur eat pickles?
- He can't get his heads into the jar.
Arthur was applying for a job at the railroad.
- Ok, here's the scenario, said the interviewer, Two trains are travelling at 75 miles per hour towards each other on the same track, what do you do?
- I'd go and get my friend Delbert.
- Your friend? Why would you do that?
- He's never seen a train wreck before.
Arthur had been a car mechanic ever since he dropped out of high school, he died young at the age of 34. When he met Saint Peter at the gates of heaven he asked:
- Saint Peter, why did you let me die so young?
- Well now Arthur, based on how many hours you've been charging your customers according to your accounting records you are 95 years old.
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